My Hypnobabies Homebirth in Lawrenceville
Did you have the baby yet???
So at 41 weeks, after a long day in Downtown Atlanta with Gail Tully, of Spinning Babies, working some magic on me, I came home to spend the evening with my little girl. After bath and bedtime, I settled in for some time on the computer. Of course, this led to chit-chat on the Facebook. After fielding the “Is he here yet” queries I chatted with an acquaintance for a bit until my droopy eyes got the best of me. This must’ve been around 11 or so. I laid my achy body down on the couch and turned on the DVR for some daytime television. Mike was working late at the restaurant since it was a Saturday night, and I had dozed off before he got home. Sometime around 1:30am is when he got home and fixed himself something to eat. He sat down in the living room and I must have woken up then. We chatted for a small bit about our day and eventually I was awake enough to realize I needed to pee. Big surprise, there!
I remember commenting as I got up something to the effect of “Wow, I sure can feel that bodywork from today!”
Time for Baby!
Once in the bathroom, I felt the need to hang out for a while; I just didn’t feel ‘done’. I felt a lot of pressure like I needed to poop and I’d feel better. Then I had accompanying gas-like sensation in my lower abdomen. I sat for a bit and did some deep breathing and gentle pushing to try and make it happen. The pressure wasn’t letting up and I realized that the sensations were easing up and then coming back. Hmmmm. The fact is that I had already had to use some of my hypnotic tools, and had even started to switch OFF and rest my head against the wall. It must’ve been about 15 minutes I sat there like that before I got the shakes. Once that happened, I kinda knew it was time. I remained calm when I told Mike it was time to get going upstairs. In my own mind, though, I knew the shakes were a sign of a later stage of my birthing time.
I got in the bed and laid on my side to remain comfortable during the intense waves of pressure I was feeling. I told Mike to go ahead and call all the peeps. I felt as though I couldn’t hold a conversation at that point. Already. Mike had the good sense to put on my Birth Guide CD and play Early Birthing Time for me and that really helped remind me of some of my tools and get me to focus on certain things that I may not have if I had been left to my own devices. This was also nice since I never got to hear it at Marlowe’s birth. I think we called Mom first. She had just gone to sleep after working a long day and was so disappointed to think of not making it to his birth. We all agreed that her safety was much more important and that she shouldn’t risk the 6 hour drive when she was so tired.
Our next call was to my midwife Rachel, of Birthing Way Midwifery, who was about 45 minutes away at this hour. I had to talk with her to explain what was happening, and while we were on the phone (I am not sure how long) I had 2 or 3 birthing waves where I just shut OFF while she waited on the line. While I shut my switch OFF I was able to relax and breath, although I still felt very intense pressure. I was indeed uncomfortable during these waves. I had asked Mike to get my birthing log and stopwatch to time a few and see where they were, but I was having a hard time telling when they were ending and starting. There were definite peaks, but it seemed they were right on top of each other. By now it was about 2:30 or so.
Next call was to our birth photographer, Andie, who is a good solid hour away. She was asking me silly crazy questions like ‘how far apart are they’ and she told me to call her once my midwives had arrived and checked me. I didn’t have the heart or the capacity to tell her that there would be no checks. We got off the phone and I was back in my zone.
I was sending Mike all around doing the last minute things that had been on my to-do list for some time. I had several things waiting for now, such as sheets on the bed and bowls for vomit and placenta, etc… Because my pressure waves were happening very quickly I sometimes was very short in my request and/or description of what needed to be done.
One thing I recall saying that I chuckle at now goes something like this: “Oh I think I’m gonna freak out! Get me a bowl!” and Mike brings me the trashcan from our daughter’s bathroom and I lean in to find a dirty Pull Up! Oh, man! Out comes my head and Mike takes out the bag and I yak into the empty can. Now, here is my reasoning for the freak out statement. I wasn’t REALLY going to freak out… I knew that if I was throwing up, and combined that with my personal and professional experiences so far, that birth was right around the corner. And no one was there yet! In hindsight, I wouldn’t have been too upset if no one made it, but I knew that Mike would be a bit overwhelmed.
This is the stuff good stories are made of, right?
Finding the right birthing position
I remember choosing to leave the bed and get on my knees beside it and lean to let my belly hang loose. This, for me, was NOT comfortable AT ALL. I might even go so far as to say it hurt. Yup. Definitely not the position for me to enjoy my birthing time in. After that, I decided to sit on the potty some more. I liked the stability and the gravity of it, I suppose. I spent a bit of time in there just going from OFF to CENTER, and repeat. I laid back in the bed and after a bit I couldn’t take the feeling of every birthing wave I might pee all over the place. I really felt that I was actively holding it back and therefore I realized that I must not be fully relaxed. So, back to the potty I went. After a wave or two I felt a bit pushy and just kinda went with it. Nice and gentle, slow- not urgent- pushes. I can’t recall how many of these there were. Perhaps even just the once… anyway during one of these gentle type pushes, my waters released.
That sounds so romantic, doesn’t it?
The truth of my experience this time around was more like my membranes exploded! Literally a huge POP!
And a splash of fluid burst out. I yelped and stood up- checking for A) my baby and B) condition of the fluid. Clear-we were all good (and no baby). Mike was on the phone with Rachel I remember and I told him to tell her what was up. I stood up and ran some water in the tub and a few minutes later was in and pushing.
The final moments before he was born…
I wish I had a better record of all this, but it really did all happen so quickly. Mike was so preoccupied with phone calls, and our daughter and my directions. I think at this point Mike was on the phone with Rachel to guide her into the neighborhood because she had missed her exit! I remember her asking him if he saw anything between my legs. That was funny. I just told her through him that he was coming and I could feel him pressing forward. Next thing I know Rachel is running up the stairs as I am pushing Baby Boy down and out. This is when Mike finally gets the video camera rolling. He sets it on the dresser outside the bathroom door, so there is only a visual of his deodorant and the audio of my final 2 pushes with crazy background feedback. When Mike was on the phone with Rachel he had been using a Bluetooth device and dropped it on the vanity when Rachel arrived. Right next to her phone that was still on, too apparently. So there was an incessant screeching feedback with everything that was said. Kinda like the Friday the 13th sound effects.
She gets to my side just as his head is crowning and emerging from my body. I tell her to help support me, and that I was feeling ‘burny’ at the top. She said that there was no pressure there and to keep doing what I was doing. She had my back(side). So I used my knowledge and thoughtfully pushed him out using my waves and urges as my guide and his head finally stayed out! Now this is the part Rachel says she remembers the most:
“We were waiting for a contraction [birthing wave] for you to push him out, you were looking at me and I was looking at you and you had the biggest smile on your face. I loved that!!!”
I said to my husband “come on in baby, his head is out”- his head was out and the rest would be here soon. He came in with Marlowe on his hip. She looked worried and was saying “Mommy? Mommy?”. I just reassured her that I was ok and that her baby brother was coming. Rachel resolved his nuchal cord and within a few moments his body came forth, she said grab your baby- I reached down and pulled him to my chest.
Marlowe looked astounded, Mike looked stunned, I was beaming (I sighed Holy Mackeral) and Baby Boy soon was screaming like a dinosaur. This is when I finally told them to turn off the phones. I think his cry and the resonating feedback scared Marlowe. I noticed that he was so clean! I mean, yes he was born into water, but man he was clean. Mike told us it was 4:02 am.
Next, I told everyone that I had felt my ‘separation gush’. Mike and Marlowe went to call Gigi. Mike called Andie who was still at least 45 minutes away and told her not to worry we would get some newborn photos instead in a couple of days. I wasn’t feeling any more waves to assist with the birth of my placenta so I just went ahead and gave a good push and out she came. They may have been there, I just wasn’t noticing them. Rachel waited for his cord to stop pulsing and then we let Mike do the deed. Rachel went to get a bowl for us to preserve the placenta. We hung out in the tub for a bit and then I let Mike take him to our bed while I rinsed off and made my way to the bed. We all bundled together and soon, Beth arrived to help with documentation. Baby Boy was still screaming. We tried to nurse, but it was not an instant thing for us. That’s ok. I knew we’d just keep on trying.
Baby Boy weighed in at 9 lbs even, 21 inches long. He finally stopped screaming at about 8 am. And a day or so later we revealed his name: Zephyr Stephen DiBella . His middle name is to honor my little brother who passed on in 2004.
And to answer the inevitable question; from Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia Zephyr may refer to:
- A light or west wind.
- Zephyrus, one of the Anemoi and the Greek god of the west wind
- Zephyranthes, a plant genus whose species include the zephyr lily
- Zephyr (graffiti artist), a well-known graffiti artist from New York City
- Zephyr (protocol), an instant messenger protocol and application-suite
- Zephyr (Wooldridge), a stainless steel sculpture by Steve Wooldridge on the IUPUI campus
- Zephyr (candy), a soft marshmallow based candy, very popular in Post Soviet countries. Produced mainly in Latvia.
More to follow on the Fourth Trimester soon! Thanks for following our journey…
