The last several weeks of my pregnancy I actually began feeling better than I had in my second trimester since my SPD stopped acting up. I was still kind of achy but it was pretty insignificant. With January 8 being 40 weeks gestation, the holidays were an exercise in patience. For some unknown reason I shared with everyone that December 27 had laid itself on my heart as Baby Boy’s birthday. Come to find out, that date happened to be 38w2d for me, EXACTLY the gestational age that Marlowe was born! I thought this was a really great day for him to arrive: it would be a Monday so Mike would be off from work, Christmas and all the hoopla would be over so we could enjoy that time with Marlowe, my Mom was already going to be here for the holiday, and my photographer had a wide open schedule.
As part of the maintenance portion of Hypnobabies® Childbirth Hypnosis we listen to a very unique ‘Visualize Your Birth’ CD in which you can mentally and emotionally practice entering labor, experience your comfortable birthing techniques and give birth easily and in a very detailed and personal way. This “mental birthing rehearsal” is very important to the process of easy and comfortable birthing and is done many times until your Hypno-baby is born, helping program the subconscious mind to produce exactly the kind of birthing you want. Athletes and public speakers of all kinds do this to prepare with great success, and so do Hypno-moms! I began doing so right around 37 weeks. In this last month or so, I had also treated myself to a prenatal massage at Atlanta Pregnancy Massage. This specialized pregnancy massage is designed to reduce muscular tension and stress, decrease swelling of feet and legs and increase circulation. In addition, it helps address the postural distortions that can occur during pregnancy, relieve trigger points with deeper neuromuscular techniques and provide a lasting effect to improve a mom’s overall comfort during her pregnancy. On top of all that good stuff, I am sure it also helped keep me calm, cool and collected for my spur of the moment weekend adventure to New Hampshire. 35 weeks pregnant with a 20 month old infant in arms to and from New Hampshire in 3 days. To keep it short and sweet let’s just say that it was not nearly as awful as it could have been. And Marlowe actually was very cooperative and well behaved.
My friend had recently expanded her business to include belly casting and offered her services to me to help build her portfolio. A plaster-casted belly is a special way to capture the beauty of your pregnancy. You can turn your most special time into a timeless keepsake for you and your family. Anybody that knows me knows that I love a deal, so after she decorated and painted the cast from Marlowe’s belly that my Mom and I had done, we planned to cast Baby Boy’s belly. In my 36th week Liza Fewell of LizaBean Designs came over and did the cast and I told her of my idea about the tree of life as the design concept. I told her once again to take creative license and go for it after I saw what she had created for Marlowe.
Marlowe and I went to the Georgia Aquarium for some Mommy/ Daughter time with our friends Andie of Andie Freeman Photography and Zoe (her daughter). I thought this would be good for us to do before her world got rocked by the new addition. Andie is an amazing photographer and I am so lucky to know her not only professionally, but to have her as my friend. We took advantage of her talents and scheduled our family photo session to capture these last moments as a family of 3. She also experimented with some new ideas for her ‘Celebrate Life’ concept of maternity photography. Basically, she and I agree that the pregnant woman’s form is so much more lovely without all the binding and bunching of ill fitted maternity clothes. The women always look so stunning in their natural shape and form.
My Mom arrived on December 22 to join us for the holidays and *hopefully* the birth of our son. I enlisted the artistic talents of another friend, Jennifer Marlow of Magnolia Birth to do a Henna stain on my belly. I imagined it looking so divine in the photos from my birthing time. We decided on a really ornate and beautiful tree of life scene that took about 4 hours to hand paint. I loved it. Unfortunately, it didn’t stain…bummer! We tried another time, but that one didn’t take, either. No Henna belly for my birthing time, I suppose my regular ole belly would have to do.
So needless to say after Christmas day we began to wait. Now since my daughter had come around 38 weeks and ‘typically’ second and subsequent babies are born a bit sooner, I started to worry a bit. There were so many things I needed to have ‘line up’ to fit into my vision for his birth. I needed Mike to not have to miss work (in this economy every penny counts!), I needed my Mom to be there to help with Marlowe, I needed my photographer to be able to attend, I needed to be able to travel to Maryland at the end of the month for Sheridan Family Christmas. I also wanted an early daytime birth so I was not sleep deprived to start. Marlowe’s birthing time was perfect- we started at about 10:30am and she was born at 2:50pm. So these were all the things I visualized for my birth. I watched my birth video of Marlowe and took mental notes on how things could be different for me and provide an even easier birth this time, not that hers was difficult by any means but it WAS my first try!
Since there was no baby yet, I figured I would take advantage of another friend’s talents and schedule a maternity session with Freedom to Birth (I had won it in a raffle at BOLD Red Tent Event). BOLD is a global movement to make maternity care mother-friendly. BOLD inspires communities around the world to organize productions of Karen Brody’s critically acclaimed play about childbirth, Birth, and BOLD Red Tent birth storytelling circles to raise money and awareness to make maternity care the best it can be for all mothers. We had a good day traipsing around Downtown Lawrenceville and got some fun pictures as we got to know each other a bit more.
By this time, the calls and emails had started to trickle in. Everyone of course wanted to know if he was here yet… I was still trying to plan everything out so each time it was “well, now we are waiting for the next Sunday or Monday (Mike’s days off)”. Mike thought a 1.1.11 or 1.11.11 birthday would be cool. My Mom said “if he stays in a REALLY long time he could be born on your brother’s birthday- Jan. 29”. Andie said “He better not try to come on Jan. 9- that’s Zoe’s birthday party!”. I was really getting it all. By this time, my Mom was back in town for Baby Boy’s guess date. Well, Zoe’s birthday came and went with no new baby for us, so Andie didn’t miss the birth and we didn’t miss the party.
Then. It. Happened. ‘Snowpacolypse 2010’. The snow began to fall on Sunday night and continued through the day on Monday. All of Metro Atlanta was snowed/iced in for an entire week basically. Once it stopped snowing, everything began to melt, but then the temperature dropped again which made everything ice over… this lasted the whole week when finally the temps stayed above freezing long enough for a significant meltdown to occur. This was so hard on me because I was of course worried that if Baby Boy decided to come, no one could get to me and we would face an unassisted home birth. Not that I personally believe that this is the worst situation that could arise, but Mike sure was adamant about going to a hospital should my midwives not be able to make it. Now, since the snow storm had hit, my Mom was stranded here and couldn’t go home and back to work. So, all of my ‘needs’ were being contradicted. There was no way in this snow/ice storm that my midwives or photographer could get to me, but my Mom was here and Mike was off from work.
By this point I was really feeling the eyes on me so to speak. Well, my Mom’s eyes were literally on me. I really felt like every sneeze or hiccup got me the look and the question ‘feel anything?’. By Wednesday the main roads were pretty ok to drive, so Mom ventured home grandson-less. My mom was gone and the midwife situation was getting better, but still wasn’t 100%. Things were NOT lining up!
I had already been taking 5W which are prenatal herbal formulations designed to help ripen the cervix and tone the uterine muscle. Typically, they do this by causing an increase in toning contractions in late pregnancy. If humans lived now as we evolved, even very pregnant women would still be doing a lot of walking around, foraging for food or moving about by foot instead of by car. Those normal levels of adrenaline from daily activity caused toning contractions (archaically called Braxton-Hicks contractions), which helped move the baby into the optimal position for birth and toned the uterus for an easier labor and birth. Moving the baby’s head down onto the cervix helped ripen the cervix so it would open more easily when the contractions of labor started. Having a ripened cervix helped the baby to come in a timely fashion, preparing the uterus to be ready to go into labor as soon as baby threw the switch. This meant that baby was more likely to have a nice, flexible head for easier molding and less likely to release meconium before birth. I had been much more mobile during my first pregnancy and did get several hours of walking done in a day since I worked in a restaurant. I had also been taking EPO (Evening Primrose Oil) to help soften and ripen my cervix, had been drinking Red Raspberry Leaf Tea and had done a Fear Release Session. In Hypnobabies classes, you are taught to surround yourself with only positive people and messages, to create a positive view of childbirth and the expectation that your birthing with be a beautiful, peaceful experience. Hypnobabies’ Fear Clearing Sessions are integral to this process, as they allow you to address fears, work through possible solutions and then release them. Fear in labor can create tension, which creates pain, then more fear, and the cycle continues. Fear and anxiety can also create adrenaline production in the body, causing the labor to become dysfunctional, a common reason for Cesarean Section surgery. Freedom from fear can make a significant difference in the birthing experience.
Over this snow break I had really begun to try and instigate his arrival. Now, I tried another Fear Release and Come OUT, Baby. This powerful hypnotic audio track brings you deeply into hypnosis and directs you to relax the birthing muscles all around your baby, release fears and concerns that may be holding you back from entering labor, and let go of any *control issues*, as well as communicate with your precious baby about how much you want to see him/her. It also gives you powerful suggestions that your labor will start soon and be strong, effective and comfortable. It was then that I realized that instead of simply ‘visualizing’ my birth, I was trying to control my birth. Uh, duh! You can’t control birth! You have to let go of the control, let go of anxiety and really accept nature’s path.
I also headed to a chiropractor friend to make sure everything was lined up and open for an easy exit for my baby. Chiropractors specializing in Websters In-Utero Constraint Technique (formerly known as breech turning) gently free a breeched baby to turn on its own. Chiropractic care often prevents constraints and makes both the pregnancy and delivery easier for the mother and the baby by helping with their neurological function, freedom of movement and level of comfort.
So as my 40th week came to a close, I was looking forward to a continuing education Spinning Babies workshop in Atlanta hosted by GBN at See Baby. We talk about the Belly Mapping process in class #4 along with Optimal Fetal Positioning. Optimal Fetal Positioning aims to help a fetus into the occiput anterior position for labor by giving the mother guidelines for maternal positioning in pregnancy and during labor. Gail Tully herself was there in person to guide us along the practice that her work is based on. Lucky me, I was the live subject study for teaching, learning and applying all the techniques!
On this day, Saturday Jan 15, I was 41 weeks along. I was big. But, I could still move easily. I had a lot of fun doing all the moves and stuff, too. I think it will really help me in my own applications. All day everyone was commenting on my state of pregnancy, and I did get a lot of ‘that baby is definitely coming tonight!’. I told them all I was ok with that- it was time for sure. But baby will come when he’s ready.
So many lessons I had already learned, as I knew I would. I knew when I got pregnant that this pregnancy and birth were going to bring teaching moments to me, so that I could grow as an educator and supporter as well. One of the wonderful tools that I came across was this great website to help your support team and well-meaning friends & family when B-day is approaching. Everyone seems to want to know “Have you had that baby yet?”. I hope you will find it helpful as well! Stay tuned for the next installment where I will share Baby Boy’s Birth Day Story.
